SCHAAAAAAAAAAAAAASHAGEEEEZ!

SOME WEE MOLES HAVING A REAL GOOD TIME IN NOTTINGHAM,SMOKING,DRINKING,PLAYING STRIP POKER.

ANDY PURE WISHES THEY WOULD LET HIM JOIN IN,HE LOVES STRIP POKER,FAGS N BEER.

GUYS IVE FOUND MY NEW FETISH......BIG SAUSAGE FLASHER,JUST LIKE THE DUDE FAE PINK FLAMINGOS.

ANDY IS DESPERATE LADIES,HE JUST WANTS SOMEBODY TAE EAT HIS BIG SAUSAGE,LOOK HES EVEN PUT IT IN A BUN.

ANDY SHAT HIMSELF IN ASDA AS THERE WAS NAE TOILET ROLL IN THE CUBICLE,HE HAD TO WIPE HIS ARSE WITH HIS THREE DAYS OLD BOXERS,JUST AS WELL REALLY,MEANS HE HAS A CLEAN SET FOR EVERY DAY LEFT NOW..SO FRESH AND SO CLEEEEEEEAN.

GILLIAN MCKEEF CAME DOON TO THE NEWCASTLE GIG AND TOLD US WERE WE HAVE BEEN GOING WRONG WITH TOUR FOOD....THIS IS THE BAD TABLE,NOTICE ITS ALL SHADES OF BROWN AND GREY.

THEY LET A HOMELESS DUDE WHO HAD BEEN BATTERED WITH A BLACK EYE IN TO THE NEWCASTLE SHOW,EVERYONE WELCOME AT DIVORCE GIGS.

MIDNIGHT TESCO RAMRAID....IM HANGING ABOUT THE KIDDY SECTION TRYING TAE FIND WEE BOYS THAT LOOK LIKE GIRLS THAT LOOK LIKE JUSTIN BEIBER.

FOUND ANOTHER NEW FETISH,BRA HATS.

SHOES ARE NOW TOTALLY FUKED,IM HAVING TO CRUSH LAVENDER WE FOUND IN A CHURCH GARDEN INTO THEM....I AM SO EMBARRASSED I FUKING STINK.

THE SQUAT WE STAYED IN NEWCASTLE HAD NO DOORS,THE FRONT DOOR WAS OFF ITS HINGE AND SO WAS THE ROOM WE STAYED IN,I BANGED INTO IT AND KILLED SIMON.

THE FRIDGE IN THE SQUAT HAD SOME NICE CHUNEY IN IT BUT IT NEEDED A RIGHT GUID CLEAN.

MASSIVE BOGEY ON THE TOILET DOOR.

1ST SECTOR OF THE HUMAN CENTIPEDE.

PURE DESTROYED, FEART OF GETTING SCABIES,HAD TO TAKE THREE VALIUM AND BASICALLY LIVING THE DREAM GUYS.

AREET.

HIYA.

OLA.

ANDY FUKING STRESSING OUT HIS NUT IN THE FIRST OF THE TWO SHOWS WE ARE DOING OURSELVES...EDINBURGER.

ANOTHER FULL HOUSE.

BEST EDINBURGH SHOW WE HAVE EVER DONE...THANK YOU EDINBURGH,GLASGOW TONITE,PLEASE COME DOON!